I have a friend I’ve known for almost fifteen years. We used to talk about everything. Somewhere along the way, I became the person who always called first. I didn’t really notice it until my birthday last year. She sent me a nice message, and I replied asking if she wanted to get together. She said she’d love to and would let me know when she was free.

She never did.

A few weeks later, I called her. We talked for nearly two hours. She told me about work, her relationship, problems with her family. It felt completely normal. At the end she said, “We really need to do this more often.”

And something about that sentence bothered me. Because I realized we weren’t doing this. I was. So I decided not to call again. Not as a test or punishment. I just wanted to see what would happen if I stopped being responsible for keeping our friendship alive.

It’s been seven months.

She hasn’t called. I miss her. Sometimes I pick up my phone and almost break the silence. But now I’m wondering whether I’m protecting myself, being stubborn, or finally accepting something I didn’t want to see.

I genuinely don’t know.